Have you ever found yourself often thinking why you're with a particular person even when you know they're not worth your time or effort but you went with it anyway?
"When you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags."
When you're head over heels in love with someone, you tend to often ignore their harmful and toxic behavior at the beginning of the relationship. You may be investing a lot more in him than he would care to reciprocate, and as time goes, it can even become a norm in the relationship. Though you may have been willing to put up with it in the hope that they will change, it has a reached a point where you can no longer carry on.
Is this what our future together will be like? Is the relationship worth my time? Does he even care if I stay or leave? If these were the kind of questions that are on your mind of late, it is possible that you gave a lot more to the relationship emotionally than he cared to notice.
Here are 8 signs that you emotionally invested yourself in someone who wasn't worth your time or effort:
You always found yourself going out of your way to be there for them emotionally and physically. It is possible that you even downplayed and pushed aside the things that mattered to you, and prioritized his needs and the future of the relationship over your own. You hoped that the love you share is worth the effort you've put in. But it was nowhere close to enough as he never bothered to reciprocate.
You often felt like you were trying to keep up with their mood or even match up to the way they felt, possibly ignoring your own emotional needs and health. There were several occasions where you felt tired and mentally drained by simply being in the relationship, but the love you felt for them always seemed to suppress the sadness that you felt. However, the emotional exhaustion has made it difficult for you to focus on your goals and desires, leaving you questioning if it's even worth it.
There might've been occasions where they would've blown their cap in front of your friends and family but you always seemed to deviate the blame to yourself saying that it was your fault rather than his. You may have tried to come up with some sort of justification for their behavior and the way they treated you when they were annoyed or upset. But the fact that they failed to see how it hurt you made it clear that they're not worth it.
When you're with the person you love it should be easy to open up to them and be vulnerable with your emotions, however, you find it to be the exact opposite with your partner as you feel that it might scare them off or it could be too soon in the relationship. When you were with them you felt like your future was unstable and there wasn't a sense of direction but all those thoughts disappeared the minute you saw them.
When you love, you love unconditionally, especially when it's with the person you can't seem to let go of even when they're negatively impacting the way you think and live your life. Your partner, however, doesn't seem to hold the same feelings towards you as they would only shower you with love once in a while but you felt that it was enough of a confirmation for you to hold on to the relationship.
You let your partner see your authentic self - with all its flaws and insecurities - hoping it would bring you closer. But they refused to reciprocate and open up. You knew that the person you were with didn't seem fully committed to you but you always found yourself ignoring that feeling and tried to be better for them. The lack of emotional intimacy often made you feel like you don't even know the person you're in a relationship with, which often made you feel lonely. The relationship almost felt like a routine when you were with them, you would spend time together but you kept ignoring the void that kept taking up space in your heart.
It always looked like you were the one putting in the effort and time to make the relationship work. Even if it looked like he didn't care enough, you kept changing yourself or tried to find a reason to keep the relationship alive. If things did seem to take a turn for the worse, you fought to keep the relationship alive, even if it meant making a few sacrifices that weren't on the plan. However, true couples always compromise and put each other's interests first, balancing out the relationship. Now that you look back on it, you realize it was the opposite for you.
When you're with the person you love, you would want to share the experiences that make you happy with them. But you know that the relationship is not worth fighting for when you feel guilty for doing things that you love or even simply being yourself. You realize that your partner never understood the person you are which perhaps even made you feel responsible for it. but you almost always blamed yourself for it, rather than making him aware of it. So whether it came to doing things that you love or being yourself, you always held back and tried to be someone you're not.