7 Reasons People Find Your Personality Intimidating

7 Reasons People Find Your Personality Intimidating

If your confidence threatens other people, you say "so be it". You turn around, walk away, and continue being yourself. Because deep down you know, the people who truly love you will follow.

It's hard trying to please everyone. After all, you're not about to tailor your personality to each person that you meet. But if there's one word that people like to use to describe you, it's "intimidating". You like your alone time as much as you like spending time with people. You find yourself being quiet sometimes while other times you're loud about your opinions. And it often makes people misunderstand you. Here's how you can tell.

1. You have zero tolerance for people who give excuses

Your strong personality comes with great ethics. When you say something, you mean it and do exactly that. But when you see people complaining unnecessarily or making excuses for not fulfilling their promises, you immediately call them out. You don't let people get away with being two-faced and when you have the strong conviction to say it to them, they might find you intimidating and refuse to accept it.

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2. You're brave enough to speak up when you have to

To say what you want and stand up for your needs is one of the most admirable qualities. But not everyone has the emotional bandwidth to empathize with your needs and it makes them feel like you're coming off too strong. "When you're quick to speak your mind, and expect the same from others, your personality can come off as aggressive by people," psychotherapist and relationship coach. Adamaris Mendoza, told Bustle.

3. You don't bother with small talk. You like deep conversations

You're not one to shy away from deep, even difficult conversations. Sometimes, you feel like people refuse to talk about their deeper feeling and hide their emotions behind meaningless banter. And it's something you find uncomfortable because you believe someone is running away from their problems by suppressing their feelings. That's why you don't bother with people who refrain from giving time to people who aren't ready to open up about their vulnerabilities.

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4. You don't seek attention, you just want mutual respect

You don't run your life based on the approval that others give you. You refuse to change yourself to suit what other people think. For you, it's not about getting someone's attention but about getting respect from someone who accepts you for who you are. And if your confidence threatens other people, you say "so be it". You turn around, walk away, and continue being yourself; the people who truly love you will follow.

5. You're picky about the people you open up to

Because of the tough experiences you've had to endure, you avoid people who seem manipulative. It's not being closed-off or intimidating; it's just you being protective of yourself. "When we have been bullied, neglected, or otherwise victimized, there is a good chance that we will over-read threat in others as a self-protective measure," wrote psychiatrist and an expert on mental health, relationships, and self-care, Grant Hilary Brenner, for Psychology Today.


6. You almost never ask for help

When you run out of opportunities, you create them yourself. You like keeping things under your control and people may find your independence overwhelming, especially because you want to handle everything on your own. Strong people, especially women, "often feel we need to tough it out on our own. We forget to give others the gift of letting them help us," wrote Marcia Reynolds, acclaimed coach.

7. You're brutally honest but not everyone can handle it

The one thing you never do is sugarcoat the truth and you prefer to surround yourself with people who can handle it. But often, the emotionally weak ones find it too much to handle and might think you're being aggressive. "Being direct and assertive involves being honest and genuine while remaining appropriate, diplomatic and respectful of yourself and others," wrote psychotherapist and founder of Urban Balance, Joyce Marter, for HuffPost.

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