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New Mom Devastated After Boyfriend Called Her "Embarrassing" And Insulted Her With Vulgar Names During Childbirth

New Mom Devastated After Boyfriend Called Her "Embarrassing" And Insulted Her With Vulgar Names During Childbirth

The 20-year-old mother was miserable after her boyfriend's behavior towards her and shared her story.

The day a woman becomes a mother, she begins a new phase in life. But the journey comes with months of exertion and intolerable pain. Did you know labor pain is equal to 20 bones fracturing at the same time? So the pain is unimaginable. It's quite normal for a woman who's experiencing so much to expect all the emotional support that one can offer. But what would someone do when they're showered with insults instead?

A 20-year-old heartbroken new mom shared her experience on Reddit about how her boyfriend let her down. "We have been in a relationship for 1 year and we had a baby boy last week. I had a natural birth and my bf was there throughout the whole process. I screamed A LOT and each time I did he whispered something like 'can you stop screaming, you're really embarrassing me.' I also threw up a few times and I saw him cover his face in shame." Her boyfriend's reaction added to the physical pain that she was going through to bring her little boy into this world.

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Her boyfriend, 20, who was supposed to be the one providing her with words of comfort called her "embarrassing" when she tried holding someone else's hand. The mother added, "When I held the midwife's hand for comfort he whispered 'let go of her, stop being so embarrassing.' He also said that my birthing position was embarrassing and called me a few vulgar names. I'm really upset about his behavior that day, especially when it was when I needed his support the most."

To the mother's distress, the boyfriend refuses to accept his behavior. "When I try to talk to him about it he denies ever saying it and that I'm being silly..." she said. "He refused to go to the antenatal classes because 'men don't go'. I was the only person there without a partner, I felt awful," she said remembering the times her boyfriend hurt her.

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The mother admitted that there had been hints of her boyfriend's demeaning behavior throughout their relationship but it was only after his disrespectful demeanor at the hospital that she thought of how toxic he was for her. "There have been other times where he has mistreated me, but nothing has shocked me as much as this. I'm beginning to look at him very differently," she said.

The mother divulged that her boyfriend doesn't care about their baby as well. She explained, "He isn't very helpful with baby. I do absolutely everything, he uses the excuse of he works so I should do the childcare. He does the fun stuff, but I do all the hard work."

The incident attracted a lot of reactions from people in the comments. HuneBunch, one of the users, said, "The abuse he showed during the birth, the acting like your crazy and claiming he didn't do those things......not good. I bet if you think back on things you'll see this isn't the first time he's gaslighted you and, I doubt it will be the last. Its hell living with someone who does that to you wears down your self-confidence."

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Another person, loujules17 said, "Please end this relationship. He was downright cruel to you when you were at your most vulnerable. This isn’t a case of him freezing or being unsure of what to say to comfort you. This was him actively tearing you down while you needed him most."

"Given that he’s not apologizing but instead denying it ever happened, I don’t think this is going to get better. Sounds like the beginnings of an abusive relationship to me," penned formerbarracuda6, who also read the mother's experience.

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The woman later gave an update that all her experiences made her understand her worth and people she'd lost along the way which made her take an important step. She said, "...Since I left him I've found that some of the friends I lost while I was with him came forward and it's felt great. He cut me off from a lot of my friends and family, sometimes without me even noticing until I stood back and looked...". She's considering going for therapy to gain back her mental health.

References:

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/htfqo9/my_20f_boyfriend_20m_said_that_i_was_embarrassing/