"My wife declined to take part in the celebration and called me controlling and selfish for returning the cake," he said.
Balancing a household with a daughter and a stepdaughter requires patience and neutralism. However, even with support and constant presence, things can go wrong from time to time. Here is one such story. A Redditor found himself in an infuriating situation when his wife made changes to a special cake he had ordered for his daughter's birthday. He turned to Reddit's AITA community to ask everyone if he was at fault for returning the cake after she took it upon herself to make changes.
"I have a daughter (now 13) "Olivia" from my former relationship. Currently, I'm married to my wife who has a daughter (16) "Britney." So, Britney is the opposite of Olivia. for example, Britney is a social kid, Olivia is an introvert. the list is long but they're just the complete opposite." He continued, "Olivia's 13th birthday was 2 days ago. She loves chocolate and I decided this is the flavor I was going to go with when I contacted the bakery. However, my wife objected since Britney absolutely hates chocolate and suggested we go with Vanilla. I said no way because, for one, Olivia hates vanilla and it's also her birthday so, she gets to have her cake with her favorite flavor." The Redditor wrote that his "wife got upset and took it in a wrong way said that he had "no regard" for Britney and that they should just choose another neutral flavor instead. The father decided to not discuss this issue any further and stick to the flavor he chose as it was Olivia's favorite.
"On the day of the birthday, I was supposed to go get the cake but I was surprised to see my wife coming home after picking up the cake from the bakery. I looked at it and discovered that it wasn't a chocolate cake but a vanilla cake with small pieces of chocolate on top. I got pissed thinking they got my order wrong and was about to contact them, but my wife said there was no mistake and that she called the bakery the day before and made "slight changes" to the cake to please both girls. I was stunned I lost it on her and asked why the hell she did that."
When confronted, she got defensive saying that birthdays are no "excuse" to show favoritism and that her daughter is "watching" and "observing" how he was treating both girls. He told her off since he was the one paying then called the bakery and explained what happened. "I had the cake returned and replaced with a chocolate cake. Although this one is smaller it was fine"
He continued, "My wife declined to take part in the celebration and later we got into a huge argument where she called me controlling and selfish for returning the cake instead of using this opportunity to teach Olivia to compromise so everyone's happy. now I'm teaching her to be "selfish". I said that my daughter gets to act "selfish" on her birthday and that she (my wife) was teaching her daughter to be entitled. Word for word and it led to a bigger argument. We're not talking as of now.
One Redditor wrote, "It’s Olivia’s birthday, not Britney’s birthday. The cake should be the flavor of what the birthday kid wants. This is a special day for Olivia, therefore there doesn’t really need to be “fairness” between your daughters. I don’t like chocolate, but when it’s my sister’s birthday, we get chocolate because it’s what she likes. I suck it up because it’s her special day. Your wife is an asshole for going behind your back. The cake was basically vanilla to make Britney happy, with tiny bits of chocolate for the birthday girl. Why can’t Britney learn to compromise? She’s older. And she should know that she can’t get what she wants on a day that’s NOT her birthday.", another wrote. The father asked the community if it was he who went wrong with his decision-making, and the community unanimously supported his decision and consoled him by saying that it was his wife who has failed as a parent in this situation.
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