"I wish I could care about what you do or where you, but I can't, My dear. I don't give a damn!" - Margaret Mitchell
By the time you are 40, you have probably experienced many realities of life, both good and bad, and sailed through them. You have also tried to stick to relationships that you thought mattered only to later understand that you have mostly been the giver. You have got your heartbroken and sleep stolen because you cared too much. But now that you are 40+ you have to stop! You have to stop pushing yourself into situations that leave you exhausted and drained, you have to stop sticking on to people because they need you, and most importantly, you have to start attaching utmost importance to your overall health and well-being.
If you are over 40, stop giving a damn about the following things already!
Through your experiences in life, you have probably made some opinions about people, situations, traditions, etc. Therefore, at any point, if you do not feel comfortable with any of these, you should be ready to walk out without second thoughts. It's not done yet, you will meet new people with who you would want to have relationships, but that should not cost you your individuality. You do not have to go to a place just to be polite to others, you do not have to wear a dress that makes you uncomfortable just because your friends think it is cool. It is high time, you owned your true, unabashed self.
You have had your share of heartbreaks. You have tried hard to make things work with people you cared about. But the only thing that you are getting in return is stress, you should let them go. After all that you have gone through, it is time you protected yourself from the negativity of people who only want to extract. The ones who feed on your positivity will never let you replenish. Therefore, you should not hesitate in cutting them off of your life and using your goodness for just yourself.
No matter how hard you try, you will never be a little less for may people. But at this stage of your life, your mantra should be - “I just want to be myself, and I really can't say I'm sorry for it. I just can't” —Aidy Bryant. You have tried to be what they wanted you to be, haven't you? And you have understood that you will never be enough for them. Therefore, leave everything behind, close every outlet that lets judgments in and celebrate yourself and your achievements.
You have probably been trained all your life by your parents to smile and be nice to people. But you know that it is hard. There are people who are obnoxious and condescending and you do not want to be nice to them - so don't be! You have acquired your own independence after years of hard work so now if you don't want to accommodate some people in your life, you don't have to. If you are a mom, you might feel guilty for snapping on your kids sometimes but make them understand that you are human too and your feelings are real so when you don't want to be nice after a long day, there are reasons for it.
First off, wanting or not wanting to go to parties has nothing to do with age. You should not tell yourself that you are too old to party. However, if you feel pressured to attend parties or functions just to be polite, you should stop. Mingling with many people at the same time could be daunting to you if you appreciate solitude. Also, many-a-time we don't really want to put on our best smile and answer unwarranted questions from people who otherwise do not care to go for a 'how do you do?' Therefore, anything that takes a toll on your peace and privacy should be avoided and not regretted.
Disclaimer: This article is based on insights from different sources. The views expressed here are those of the writer.